December 2010
33 posts
Reblog if you want (1) blowjob.
littlegirl-lost:
Can I have more than one?
“Once upon a time there was a crooked tree and a straight tree. And they grew...”
– keller ~ wristcutters: a love story
tumblr is quiet tonight. probally some holiday or...
crank 2 might be one of the worst movies of all...
old video games
shooting ppl up on my x-box and waiting for a certain girl to get her ass on skype. that’ll beat a bar anyday.
bestrooftalkever:
I see you drivin’ Round town with that girl I love And I’m like, Haiku
gettin drunk
then going to my cousins.. hopefully gonna write a paper there at 4 in the morning, reread it tomorrow to see how absurd it is. email it to my prof, see if they like it.
oh and 3 ppl who genuinely hate me, and another few that think im just a huge douchefucker are gonna be at the first bar im going to. so we’ll see how funny this evening could be.
i want all of them →
fudgeyeahsolitaryconfinement asked: what's a "nlow job"? is that a nasty job where you get must get really low, on your knees, and lick the corns between a customer's toes? ...you get paid in human nails..i think i heard of that..i don't see the appeal but i hope she gave you a good long Nlow job!
dealing with freshman in a bit. unfortunately still have a paper to do for noon tomorrow… this means i’ll be awake late. shit happens. fucking freshman. maybe she’ll hit on me and i’ll get a nlow job. probally not but a guy can dream.
“I expect to pass through this world but once and therefore if there is anybody I...”
– Sir Cecil Maurice Bowra
Reblog if you're great in bed.
Firetruck Game
Guy: Do you wanna play the firetruck game?
Girl: How do you play?
Guy: I get to run my fingers (which represent the fire truck) up your legs and then you say red light when you want me to stop.
Girl: Okay, let's play.
*few seconds*
Girl: Red Light!
Guy: Firetrucks don't stop for red lights.
LOL
lmao
quotes i've liked lately.
slow is smooth smooth is fast.
take your time in a hurry.
Lying
mybiggestregretever:
My biggest regret ever is lying. My father is a obsessive compulsive liar. I swore never to be like him. But now, I lie all the time. I can’t even keep track of them anymore. I really hope to stop and set everything straight, but it’s just too easy to lie about everything.
[Female, 18]
silly girl…. how do you go and lose track of the lies…. thats a...
im becoming very fond of the chat feature.
El Capitan: you going out tonight?
me: nope, behaving.
El Cap: I dont like this responsible you.
me: I'm ok with that.
i miss women. the ones who are worth an effort. unfortunately, they ones i consider worth an effort are far away at the moment and the ones i entertain myself with now tell me they like me. last night i was supposed to go to a banquet for my friends frat, but i couldnt find a date. when i didnt go and one girl asked why i splained the lack of a date and she said “thanks for thinking of...
i approve of my lifestyle choices.
replayin assassins creed for a bit then getting drunk in the basement with 3 buddies. this will probally mean beer pong for hours without the possibility or getting off the table.
my mommy is proud.
me: she was talking to the dude and gio thought id be jealous so he points it out
madre: but we all know that you really dont give a shit
me: haha exactly... oh ***** you know me so well... but anyway i said i'd do something funny so i walked up and gave her a huge sloppy kiss on the cheek and left again without saying a word. so the guy had no idea what happened and he asked her who i was and she wouldnt really answer so he got pissed and walked away
madre: cock block!
me: yep
haha
madre: and now you wont talk tothe poor girl until school starts again or something as equally as dickish, im kinda proud!
tuesdays night
me: hey you
her: OMG HEY!!!! I'm drunk.
me: i'm not.. tell you what, i'll go get drunk then come back and we'll make out.
her: sounds good (with a stupid grin on)
“why do i have a strange asian girl writing on my wall?”
– my best friend about a girl he doesnt know fromt he bar tuesday night
laurenquiiinn asked: you know what i was just thinking? "he hasn't posted in a while" welcome back.
“Optimism is the madness of insisting that all is well when we are miserable.”
– Voltaire, “Candide” (via quote-book)
its a good thing i didnt drink tonight
cuz im pretty ready to smack about 7 people in the mouth right now.. one being my soccer captain, one being my best friend, one being my latest fling, my other “best” friend, the girl i like from across the world… ok 6 instead of seven, but i think each one would get smacked across the fucking road with the shit theyve been pulling. im just totally donezo with this shit.